Belated Mother's Day Post

Let me just say that I was out of town for Mother's Day, and the more I see people saluting their mothers via their blogs, the more I wish I would have planned ahead.

So, Happy Belated Mother's Day, Ma. This one's for you.


My mom grew up in a family of five children, of whom she was the youngest and only girl. Her family was poor, as my grandfather ("Mickey") made little money working in a factory. But Mom would always tell us (her own five children) that she and her brothers were never in want of fun growing up. They would make games and toys out of bottlecaps or play "release the dungeon" with other neighborhood kids until they were too tired to run anymore. Her older brothers provided much entertainment- perhaps a bit too much for their little sister. My uncle Tim (who seems to have been the spitting image of "Calvin" in the famous cartoon Calvin and Hobbes) would do things like line up my mom's paper dolls and then get her in on a"fun" game of "target practice with the beebee gun." I think it sounded like a great idea to her at first, but the enthusiasm began to fade after Uncle Tim proved to be a decent shot.

Mom married at age 20 and had me almost exactly one year later. Complete "Jesus Freak Hippies," she and my dad decided to live out in the country. Mom had always been a "city girl," and recalls when she and Dad were first married being scared to death of whatever wild animal might be lurking around the house. My dad was a carpenter back then, and I can remember when I was about three and Ben, my little brother, was one, Mom would put us in the car to go have lunch with Daddy at his worksite.

We never had much money growing up, either, but Mom would always keep us entertained by teaching us songs or teaching us games that she and her brothers made up when they were younger. She would teach us to build "forts" in the living room with chairs and blankets. She would invent games with the garden hose on hot days. All five kids learned how to jitterbug, waltz and polka because of Mom. She LOVED music, and if she wasn't singing herself, music was always playing in the house. In fact, during VBS in the summertime, the church down the road always asked my mom to "do the music," since she could play guitar and knew so many great Bible songs.

One thing that I'll never forget is that Mom insisted we respect our elders. We were NEVER to call our aunts or uncles just by their first names. It was always "Aunt Patti" or "Uncle Dean." And we were always to refer to an officer as a "policeman" and not a "cop"- that was rude. If we had company, we were to politely greet them upon their arrival and say goodbye before they walked out the door- not lock ourselves up in our rooms the whole time playing by ourselves or reading books. Talking back or pouting or stomping off would always result in a sore backside. In fact, Mom was very diligent in disciplining us. Once when I was about three, we were at a friend's bridal shower. After the bride-to-be opened a set of wooden spoons and the guests were oohing and ahhing, I sang out, "Spoons to spank! Spoons to spank!" Mom recalls many of the women glaring at her. She didn't care, though. She feared God more than she feared the opinions of those flimsy women. Mom was (and still is) a tough cookie, and she depended on God to give her strength to be a strong mother. When my brother hit adolescence, he decided one day to "test the waters" when my dad was at work. At this point, Ben had grown much taller than Mom. There was no doubt about it- his attitude reeked of challenging Mom to hold to her principles of discipline. Knowing this (and knowing her size compared to his), my mom calmly went to her bedroom, shut the door, pulled down my dad's belt from the closet and prayed to God for strength and guidance. Needless to say, my brother didn't challenge her much after that!

If there is anyone in this world who knows how to make lemonade out of lemons when life gives them to you, it would be my Mom. I've seen Mom suffer many hardships and disappointments throughout her life, but she always smiled and took care of all of us during those trials. My family has seen everything from a loss of a job to a baby that wasn't expected to live for twenty four hours, and Mom perservered, with God's help, through all of it. Recently, I was talking to my dad over the phone, and he was telling me that my mom had fallen down the steps a few days prior. After hearing the thuds and her cry, he rushed into the room to help her. When he reached her, she was obviously in pain, but managed to crack a joke, making fun of herself for her "blunder." I could hear Dad smiling over the phone, "Isn't that just like your mom, Becca?"

Mom always made us appreciate what we had. Whenever we took vacations or went out on a rare treat to a restaurant, she would always remind us to thank our dad. In fact, many times, she would start the chorus, "Thank you, Daddy," and we would chime in. Whenever our family continued to grow, Dad had to build an addition onto our two-bedroom house. One afternoon, while walking down our gravel road from the school bus stop, I saw a sign hanging from the newly framed addition that my mom made: "Thank You, Dad!" She was everyone's constant cheerleader.

This brings me to a plug for women who decide to be "just a housewife" or a stay-at-home mom. My mom has been ridiculed by strangers, friends, and yes, even other family members for "wasting her talents" or horror upon horrors- submitting to her husband in doing so! As the world would view it, because of the number of children in our family and because my dad's income wasn't large, it would have been "practical" or "socially responsible" for her to go to work to provide us with a "better quality of life." (Which translates into providing us with designer clothes, more toys, taking airplanes on vacations instead of driving, staying in hotels instead of tents or cabins). By the grace of God, my parents saw the importance of having a mother raise her children instead of giving them to someone else to raise while she goes off and "does something with her life." Well, I've seen the children of many of the women who decided to "utilize their talents" or buy toys and clothes and plane rides and hotels to show them their love. More often than not, these children are ruined. Nothing pleases them, nothing tastes. They grow up to be, well, overgrown children.

Outside of being "just a housewife and mother," my mom DOES have a talent that many people don't know about: She is an excellent writer and storyteller. (I keep telling her she should start her own blog- Lord knows she has so many stories to tell!) In fact, many years ago, she considered taking a correspondence course on writing children's literature. I remember the short story she submitted for the school's review. It was about a little bird who always wanted to be something else- a frog, a duck, a bear- anything but what God had made it. Only until it had become prey to another animal was it thankful for being a bird, for its only escape was to be able to fly. This brings me to my final point and close: God made me woman. He made me to be a loving wife, and Lord willing, in the future, a loving mother. I shamefully admit, that when I left home for college, I was planning on "making something of myself;" not being like Mom. Since then, God has opened my eyes to the beauty and high calling of a stay at home wife, and I pray that God will soon give me the opportunity to be "just" a stay-at-home mom. I know that I will have much to learn, but I am so thankful that my mom was not ashamed of what God called her to do and became an example for what I will be doing.

Thanks, Mom.